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3 hours ago.
by Dirtman
Jester01
#1

The Open Mic Comedy Club

Share your humor with your favorite jokes 24/7!!! ***Disclaimer*** Remember to keep it tasteful and give credit to whom it is due. Otherwise, the offended party will most likely delete this or things just could get ugly.

 
 

Member Comments

Dirtman

As much time as Hollywood people spend in rehab, you would think they and their friends would be familiar with spiritual principles like humility for instance.

Posted 3 hours ago.

Dirtman

I will take any bets.

Posted 3 hours ago.

Dirtman

"George Clooney-Amal Alamuddin to host third wedding celebration in England...the invitation states the party is being hosted by Ramzi and Baria Alamuddin at the Danefield House Hotel and Spa in Marlow-on-Thames. A big white marquee has been erected near the house set in 65 acres of private land, just six miles away from the Grade II listed building, for the happy occasion and guests are set to be treated to a menu offered by the hotel's restaurant, choices for the main course include duck breast, roasted rib of beef, breast of corn-fed chicken and filets of lamb."

So, when will there be nasty answering machine messages, elevator confrontations, and tweet wars between these two?

Posted 3 hours ago.

anuttiermutter

The Journal rails against the thought police by saying "Houston officials have set themselves up as thought police, attempting to control what people say even in their places of worship. That is unacceptable in the United States."

Hmmmm. As Reverend Wright said, "God **** America."

Posted 19 hours ago.

anuttiermutter

I am not saying that Tennant did not break the law about electioneering at polling places. She may well have. Thanking people for their strength might be electioneering. I am just saying The Journal should have printed the quote, rather than putting it in their own words & adding a few elements

Posted 1 day ago.

Dirtman

I see the confusion of you two. It's like when Kidd celebrated in the end zone after Earl Ray and Joe were elected. HA! Clueless.

Posted 1 day ago.

Dirtman

I still can't find anyone who is saying that there is an Ebola pandemic in the US. Talking points?

Oops, breaking news, a case in NY. Who watched that news conference and did not see two goodfellas? (And the guys delivering my washer and dryer thought my Spanish was bad.)

Posted 1 day ago.

LostStormtrooper

The Journal political organization likes to resort to telling half truths and misinformation in order to manipulate elections. Similar to the liberal media political organizations. It's the American way. This poor lost sheeple trooper is still confused by this two pronged fork in the road. Which way should I go, which way should I go? I choose neither of the two options. I think they both have proven enough incompetence to run this nation. I'm just going to blaze my own trail thanks.

Posted 1 day ago.

anuttiermutter

There is video of Tennant stopping on the courthouse steps and saying, "Thank you all very much for being the strength of me, and the strength of this campaign, but most importantly the strength of West Virginia." You would think that Republican newspapers, like The Journal, covering the story would print the actual details of the alleged crime.

Posted 1 day ago.

LostStormtrooper

So did Tennant just thank her loyal party hacks at the doorway or rally them? Did Capito drop off her loyal party hacks from the bus over 300 ft. away or was it a dismounted sheeple herding? I'm so confused. What really happened? Where was the paparazzi during all this? I want cameras rolling around our politicians whenever they are in public for now on. I demand more transparency!!!

Posted 1 day ago.

anuttiermutter

"Once you recover it didn't happen." Two people sick, and now only one?? Yep, it didn't happen. There was no American Ebola Pandemic.

Posted 2 days ago.

Dirtman

Once you recover it didn't happen. I love that logic.

Posted 2 days ago.

anuttiermutter

"I am the greatest" Actually, John Lennon wrote that song for Ringo.

Posted 2 days ago.

anuttiermutter

"said would not happen here" FYI - It did not happen here. We have one person sick - and she will likely be well by the weekend.

Posted 2 days ago.

Dirtman

At what cost over something that Ebama said would not happen here? Yeah. I don't blame him for what happened (unlike my fellow Dems after 9-11), I blame him for what he said. Is it a cultural thing, like "I am the greatest" or showboating in the end zone?

Posted 2 days ago.

anuttiermutter

"Dallas nurse cleared of Ebola" The number of people who are dead from the Great American Ebola Pandemic is - zero. The number of people ill - one.

Posted 2 days ago.

anuttiermutter

"Any Czar openings?" Yes, but if you want them to attend your party, you must provide better invitations. Czars will not just attend any event. You must remember they are Czars and serve because of Republican demands.

Posted 3 days ago.

Dirtman

Maybe Ebama teleprompter doode.

Posted 5 days ago.

Dirtman

NEW YORK — David Letterman's longtime cue-card holder says he wound up cuing his own firing by getting aggressive with a colleague.

I'm sorry to hear about this (not really), but it is good news for anyone who believes their life's work has been insignificant. Any Czar openings?

Posted 5 days ago.

anuttiermutter

"Professor John Long and his team at Flinders University in Adelaide figured out how ancient fish had intercourse. Males had an “L-shaped sexual organ,” said Long, while females had “genital plates, which are like cheese graters – very rough." Sounds like they were viewing me & my ex-wife on our honeymoon videos.

Posted 6 days ago.
 
 
 
 

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