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James L. Carey

Oct 28, 2022

James L. Carey, 52, affectionately known as Jim or Jimmy by friends and family, of Shepherdstown, WV, passed away on Friday, Oct. 7, 2022, after unexpectedly suffering an anoxic brain injury and cardiac arrest the week prior. Born on Jan. 28, 1970, in Port Jefferson, NY, he was the eldest child of Donna C. (Eggler) Inman and the late James H. Carey.

Throughout his life and various careers, Jim – truly a renaissance man of his time – was widely regarded as a teacher and mentor – always seeking to share his zeal for food, music, photography, history, politics, religion, science, cultural anthropology, literature, arts, travel, architecture, and countless other topics with anyone within earshot. He was also a gifted storyteller (thanks in part to his amazing and often unbelievable repertoire of life experiences) and a prolific writer of songs, poetry, letters, journalistic articles and some of the longest text messages in history. He touched many throughout his full yet too-short life. He will be missed for his deep compassion, his wide-ranging interests and his devotion to his family and friends.

Jim could aptly be described as ‘larger than life’ in terms of his charisma, enthusiasm and appetite for life. But this quality also had a painful side that simmered below the surface throughout his life. Jim was a steadfast advocate for destigmatizing life’s struggles including mental health issues, sexual abuse, and the family diseases of alcohol and substance abuse – to all of which, he was no stranger. Despite the prevalence of tragedy in his life, he loved life in all its fullness.

Although he’d lived in Shepherdstown since 2000, Jim still thought of himself as an outsider, however others would beg to differ. The passion and intensity of his presence could turn a new acquaintance into a life-long friend in a matter of hours. His big heart and sense of loyalty also earned him many decades-long friendships. Even if someone had not seen or spoken to Jim in years, when their paths crossed again the spark of connection would be instantly re-ignited.

Music was possibly the greatest love of Jim’s life – starting with his discovery of his parents’ record collection as a young child; his front row seat for 70s-era living room dance parties in Queens, NY with his mother and ‘aunts’ (close family friends); playing saxophone in the middle school marching band in New York and Pennsylvania; discovering new and different music during high school in Pennsylvania and Southern Maryland; and ultimately discovering punk, hardcore, heavy metal, and ska music shows in DC during high school and into his early 20s and beyond. His voracious appetite for listening to music led to his learning to play guitar in his mid-20s, playing live shows with various bands along the Eastern Seaboard in the 90s and continuing to play and write music for friends and family. Attending and playing live music was his true church – where he felt most alive and connected to people, the world, the universe, and his spirituality.

In fact, it was music that brought him and his future wife, Margarita, together. While playing “Jersey Girl” (the original Tom Waits version) on his guitar at a party in Shepherdstown, he was enchanted by a voice singing along from the next room. Mistakenly believing that the person singing was there with someone else, he fled the party. After discovering his error, they immediately began dating and fell in love and married on May 17, 2003.

Realizing a career as a rock star was not his destiny, he next pursued a career as a chef. With humble beginnings as a short-order cook at numerous chain restaurants in his teens and 20’s, his culinary skills grew while working under the guidance of the head chefs at The Crossing at Casey Jones in La Plata, MD and Perry’s Restaurant in DC. From there he had the pleasure of preparing the well-designed cuisines of such notable restaurants as Red Sage in DC, and the Yellow Brick Bank Restaurant in Shepherdstown, WV.

Upon moving to Shepherdstown, meeting Margarita, and turning 30 (not a foregone conclusion as a younger man,) Jim decided to reinvent himself once again. He returned to college to pursue a new career in historic preservation and material culture. Jim earned a BA and a Historic Preservation Certificate at Shepherd University in 2005. During that time, he served as an archaeological intern for the Harpers Ferry National Park and was later hired as an archeological technician for theexploration of the Park’s Armory grounds.He next served as a museum technician with the Digital Imaging Project at the National Park Service (NPS) Interpretive Design and Conservation Center in Harpers Ferry, WV. This job took him traveling all over the United States to photographically document the various artifacts and artwork owned by the National Park system. While working for the National Park Service, Jim also earned his master’s degree in Museum Collections Management and Care from George Washington University in 2009. After his years in the Park Service, Jim served as Head of Digitization and Photography for Artex Fine Arts Services in Landover, MD. Lastly, he served as the Lead for the Medium Artifact Move Team at the Smithsonian National Air and Space Museum.

Another pivotal milestone in Jim’s life was becoming a father upon the birth of his beloved son Miles in 2013. Jim was the oldest child in his family, and a true natural with children, so while growing up he babysat younger siblings and neighborhood kids. He delighted in being an involved uncle for his sisters’ children. Jim relished his role as ‘daddy’ and was committed to cultivating in Miles a sense of appreciation of the natural world (ala National Geographic and the Discovery channel,) as well as our complex, amazing, yet flawed world. Albeit intense, the message of his passion and insatiable thirst for knowledge and understanding was certainly evident, even to his young son. He was also very devoted to teaching-by-doing with Miles – whether it be making pizza dough in the kitchen; listening to and playing music in the living room; curating their massive, shared collection of Nerf blasters in the shed; playing video games in the garage; troubleshooting homework problems in the dining room; playing catch in the yard; or carving custom-designed Jack-o-lanterns on the porch – Jim was there by Miles’s side.

He is survived by his wife of 19 years, Margarita L. (Provenzano) Carey and their 9 year old son, Miles A. Carey; his mother, Donna C. (Eggler) Inman; his sisters Michelle L. (Carey) Brosnahan and Nicole A. (Carey) Young; and his nieces and nephews Devin N. and Regan M. Brosnahan, and Sean D., Mason J., and Reese N. Young. He was preceded in death by his younger brother Sean K. Carey, his father James H. Carey, and his maternal grandmother Doris Eggler, as well as numerous dear friends – Mark Miles, Rolf Manley, Kenny Wagner, Frank Ruggles, Bill Bakley, Pat Harding, and Kenny Heflin, to name a few.

A memorial service was held at 1 p.m. on Saturday, Oct. 22, 2022, at Saint Agnes Catholic Church, located at 200 South Duke Street, Shepherdstown, WV, with Father Andrew M. Switzer officiating. After a break, a celebration of life was held at 4 p.m. that same day at the Folly at 42 Fairmont Avenue, Shepherdstown, WV 25443. Parking was available on Fairmont Avenue, Minden Street and overflow in the Shepherdstown Middle School parking lot. All are welcome to attend either or both gatherings.

In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions can be made to a charitable organization of your choice. We encourage you to consider the following suggestions – ranging from international to national to regional to local: Amnesty International (https://www.amnesty.org/en/ ), Heifer International (https://www.heifer.org/), The Lincoln Project (https://lincolnproject.us/), The Sentencing Project (https://www.sentencingproject.org/), National Alliance on Mental Illness (https://nami.org/Home), Al-Anon Family Groups (https://al-anon.org/), CASA of the Eastern Panhandle (https://mycasaep.org/) and Shepherdstown Shares www.shepherdstownshares.org.